


I'll Be Your Satellite

by rainbowflavored_fiction



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Angst with a Happy Ending, Carmilla can shape-shift, Carmilla is a Slytherin, Depression, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Laffery is in love, Laura is a Hufflepuff, Theo's a jerk and I hate him, also cameo appearance for Professor McGonagall, idk i really wanted to write a harry potter au, so i guess this takes place post-war?, so there's Catmilla
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-01
Updated: 2017-11-01
Packaged: 2019-01-28 03:23:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12597076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowflavored_fiction/pseuds/rainbowflavored_fiction
Summary: Every year on her mother’s anniversary, Laura Hollis slips away and disappears from Carmilla Karntsein’s life. The young Slytherin had always been worried about her, too nervous to ask where she goes, too shy to confess the feelings that she has been harboring for years. It was their fifth year that Carmilla finally had the courage to follow her, but she never expected to really find her secret.





	I'll Be Your Satellite

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [how oddly things develop (a HPSLAU prequel)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/6707626) by [BatWingsandBlackCats](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BatWingsandBlackCats/pseuds/BatWingsandBlackCats). 



> I wrote this a couple of months ago without the intention of uploading it so close to the anniversary date. I wrote it because I was feeling sad and had the urge to write a new story. Writing helps distract me from feeling sad. But, since the topic of depression and loneliness works its way throughout this fic once more, I figured it was appropriate to post at this time. I know I said on my tumblr I wanted to take a break from uploading anything, but I missed you guys. Reading your comments and knowing that people love my stories makes me so happy. I also really enjoy talking to you all. 
> 
> So, yeah. I'm uploading this today because while November 2nd falls on a Thursday, my great-aunt did pass away on a Wednesday. 10:30 pm. I still remember the time because I never fell asleep after that. It's so easy to be an angry and a sad person. To let your emotions take control and rule over you completely. Why would you do that when you have your whole life ahead of you? Though, I relate--it's even harder to be happy when your whole life seems like it's falling apart. I've been there. But know there is always someone out there who loves you, who cares for you, and who's desperate to reach out to you. Besides, your loved one wouldn't want you to feel sad and lonely because they're gone. Remember them in the time that they were alive and happy and healthy. 
> 
> And travel through life one day at a time. I have faith in you that you can do this too. 
> 
> Title taken from Rebecca Black's song 'Satellite'. It's beautiful. Listen to it, so you can have a feel for the story. 
> 
> Enjoy, my loves.

0o0o0o

**For my late aunt. Though you were a woman of a few words, thank you for accepting me.**

0o0o0o

Laura Hollis was the one constant thing in Carmilla's life while everything was changing around her.

She was the sun, the moon, the stars.

Her smile could light up the whole universe if she tried.

Carmilla was certain Laura didn't even know she existed.

Carmilla loved her.

She was certain of this, she had known right from the start. The very first night she saw Laura, clad in her worn robe and excitedly jumping in her place, waiting for the Sorting Hat to bestow her in her second home. Carmilla could just feel the excited, lovable energy that just radiated from the tiny creampuff as the other First Years were nervous and scared. She was so in awe of her beauty that she just stayed frozen in shock, a light blush tinting her pale cheeks, and a warm feeling fluttering in her chest.

Gods, how she wished she was sorted in the same house. But the Sorting Hat had chosen Slytherin for her, instead of Hufflepuff. Carmilla felt ice in her heart, as the other First Years had wild looks in their eyes and their faces became pale.  _Why?_  She remembers thinking desperately, gripping the edges of the wooden seat,  _why am I in Slytherin?_   _Did I do something wrong? Is it… is it because of what happened with Mother?_  Her shoulders sagged in defeat,  _I've only been here for a day and everyone thinks I'm a monster._

She searches the room for Laura, biting her lip to keep herself from crying. The tiny creampuff wasn't even looking at her. Instead, she was talking animatedly with two ginger twins, wide smiles on their faces and loving expressions in their eyes. She didn't even care.

Her heart heavy, she remembers trudging over to the Slytherin table, her fellow housemates eyeing her warily before scooting to the far end, away from her. The Headmistress looked on in pity.

Those early years at Hogwarts Carmilla remembers being so lonely; Headmistress McGonagall had taken her under her wing, sure, but she had no home to come back to during the Holidays. No family. No friends. She remembers wandering the hallways late at night, hearing the ghosts whisper past her, before staring at the starts until the sun came up. She never sleeps.

She hasn't slept since that night.

It wasn't until her Third Year that she noticed something strange.

The strange thing she noticed that on one day of the year, right before Christmastime, Laura Hollis would disappear. Just up and… vanished. There was no trace of the little Hufflepuff, and she wouldn't show up to class. The professors didn't even seem to notice that she was missing. Carmilla would glance over at her supposed best friends, and they didn't even seem to care either. It made Carmilla's blood boil, not knowing exactly where her love was. Even stranger, the following day, Laura would be back, chipper and happy to be alive as always. Carmilla wanted to hug her, yell at her, beg her to reveal her secrets, but she was so scared. She was scared because she worried Laura had already known what happened in Carmilla's past, and the moment the young Slytherin even opened her mouth, Laura would think of her as a monster.

She couldn't risk that. She couldn't risk not having Laura in her life. Her heart ached.

So, she continued to love Laura from afar, focusing on her studies, her reading, and blossomed into a talented young witch. She heard the whispers, the snickers, the bullies that ruined her day by day, but Laura Hollis was the one constant thing in her life that kept her going.

She was fine. Everything was going to be fine.

Or, at least… that's what she kept telling herself. That is, until her Fifth Year, when their two worlds collided in the most unexpected of ways. And then everything changed.

* * *

 

Carmilla's heart panged as the alarm on her clock rang, and she knew what day it was. It was November. The days were getting shorter, and the nights were colder. Carmilla would spend her nights admiring the stars and the little flurries that coated the sky.

But she was saddened because on this day she wouldn't see her love. Laura would disappear, going off to wherever she went, and then come back tomorrow. One whole day of not being blessed by her tiny pocket of sunshine.

She let out a sigh, gathering her things for the day and heading over to the showers. Nobody would be up so early this morning, which was nice. She had the entire dorm to herself.

The wonderful hot water trickled down her skin, and it was supposed to be soothing. But she couldn't relax. She felt her heart clench and the tears fall down her cheeks coming faster than she will ever admit. She vehemently hit the walls of the shower, knuckles turning red. No one will ever know that she had a mental breakdown on this day, every year. And she was determined to keep it that way.

Gods, this was killing her. She hadn't said a word in years. She was always quiet, brooding in the corner of the sentient library and always had a book in her lap. Of course, this lead to many rumors about the young Slytherin, false accusations that bore holes into her soul.

But that was fine. Let them think what they want—it was their problem.

Carmilla didn't need to explain herself to people who wouldn't bother to listen.

Once she felt refreshed, she changed into her robe and gathered her things for class. She had Potions today, her favorite, alongside Herbology.

But she knew even with Professor Longbottom's nonsensical blabbering, it wouldn't ease her spirit with the knowledge Laura wouldn't be there.

She wasn't hungry, but she knew that not eating would but her in an anxious daze. So, begrudgingly, she left the Slytherin dorms.

It was quiet in the halls. It always was, before the seven o' clock rush of students going to the main dining hall. She could easily slip into the kitchens and bother the house elves before slipping out.

"Good morning, Miss." Chimed the happy elf, as she pushed through the large wooden doors. "Your usual?"

Carmilla smiles and nods.  _Thank you, Betty._ This little elf was always kind to her, giving her an extra serving when no one was looking.

"It's that day, isn't it?" She says with a kind smile, coming back with a plate and patting Carmilla's knee. The Slytherin sighs, her shoulders sagging. "Just one day. Don't be so hard on yourself, Miss. She'll come back."

Carmilla bites her lip and nods again, before patting the elf's head gratefully, and hurried back to her dorm.

She was so focused on her meal that she didn't notice the blur of blonde hair, and a warm body colliding with hers. The plat clattered to the ground and Carmilla stumbled backward, her Phoenix-feathered wand falling besides her.

 _Are you—_ Carmilla wanted to say, but her mouth clamped shut. It was her. The girl she had been in love with for all this time, was right in front of her, slumped over, tears streaming down her face.

Laura.

"I'm so sorry," She hiccupped, staggering to her feet, "I didn't mean—I didn't see—," She wiped her eyes, and without another word, she ran off.

 _No!_ Carmilla's mind went into a panic, food forgotten, as she grabbed her wand in a hurry.  _Don't leave me again!_

Carmilla wasn't sure what came over her. She could have handled another day without her. She would have gone about the day, feeling sad and brooding. But seeing the tiny creampuff's face for the first time, had lit a fire in the young witch she wasn't sure she had.

She followed her.

She stayed a fair distance away, listening to Laura's soft cries and feeling her heart slowly break. She was going to get to the bottom of this.

Laura ran up a flight of stairs, the magical things twisting and turning as she went. Carmilla stumbled and almost fell, but she had her eyes focused on Laura. She wasn't going to lose her.

Not again.

She came across a large, wooden door and heard Laura inside of it. Crying.

The young Slytherin gently pushed it open, heart beating against her ribcage. She gasped quietly at what was inside.

A large, gorgeous mirror, with a golden trim and words encrypted on the top of it.

" _Erised stra ehru oyt ube cafru oyt on wohsi,_ " which Carmilla quickly transcribed as "I show not your face, but your hearts' desire," backwards.

It was the Mirror of Erised. Legend tells of men staring at this for hours and going mad. Nobody knows, not even Headmistress McGonagall how it got here.

Now everything makes sense.

She was startled by what she saw in the mirror. A giant black panther stares back at her, with hypnotizing yellow eyes and large teeth. She let out a quiet gasp, not expecting to see her Animagus form. She hadn't transformed into her panther since that night.

Why was the Mirror showing her this? She didn't desire to become a monster. It terrified her.

She took a tentative step forward.

"Stupefy!" Laura let out a shriek, stunning Carmilla. The Slytherin yelped, falling onto the ground.

"Ugh. That was a kick…" She mumbled quietly, wincing in pain. Had her voice always sounded this raspy and tired?

"…Carmilla?" Laura asked quietly, wiping her eyes.

The young Slytherin tried not to cry.

_She knows my name!_

Carmilla bit her lip. She noticed how tired Laura seemed, the dark circles under her eyes, the way her hair even seemed a shade darker. "Why are you here?" She asks, surprised by the gentleness in her tone.

"I… I don't…" Laura sighs, slumping her shoulders. "I don't like to be out. On this day. I'm so sad."

"I've noticed, creampuff." Carmilla says gently, giving her a kind smile.

"You…"

"Every year, my heart aches because you're just… gone. On this one day. And every year I worry about you. But at least now I know where you go. You've lost someone, haven't you?"

Laura's lip quivers, and suddenly she's crying again. Carmilla boldly sweeps into her embrace, heart on fire and her own lip quivering. She cradles her, and Carmilla marveled at how perfectly they fit into each other's lap. Laura had her head buried into Carmilla's chest, and she allowed her tears to wet Carmilla's robe.

"This is the only way I get to see my mom," She whimpered, her voice cracking, "She died when I was very young. A car crash. In the muggle world, those happen much too often. Papa and I were baking cookies for her when she got home. But she didn't make it home."

"Oh, creampuff," Carmilla says sadly, gently caressing her face.

"I can't talk about it with anyone here, because Lafontaine or Perry wouldn't understand. They're not muggle-born like I am," She lets out a huff, "So I just… come here for the day. Hang out with my mom. I… discovered The Mirror of Erised my First Year."

"Cupcake, you have to move on," She mumbles, "You can't keep doing this to yourself."

She started to cry again, looking back at her mother in the mirror. "I never got to say goodbye to her."

"She wouldn't be upset with you if you did."

They held each other for a long moment.

"Why are you sad?" Laura asked quietly, taking a deep breath.

"I'm all alone," She utters, biting her lip to keep her tears at bay. "I have no one."

"No family?"

"I'm the reason they're all gone," she whimpers, hiding her face so Laura wouldn't see her cry, "Because I'm a monster. They're all dead because of me."

"Hey…" Laura began, eyes wide as she cupped Carmilla's face, "You can't think that of yourself."

"You surely would. And leave me someday."

"No one deserves to be left behind or forgotten. I can't think of anyone ever leaving you."

The tears finally spilled down her face like waterfalls, as it was now Laura cradling Carmilla, comforting her, rubbing the small of her back.

There was a clicking of shoes on the floor, "I should expel you both," Headmistress McGonagall's voice claimed, voice feigning anger. "Aren't you supposed to be in class?"

Laura sighed, leaning her head on Carmilla's shoulder as she gently caressed her hair. Carmilla breathed in Laura's scent, her own head buried within her neck. They weren't going to leave each other any time soon.

"But I suppose… neither of you are capable of participating in your lessons today. It wouldn't be fair to you both, hmm?" She then sighed, "I see that you, like many before you, have discovered the delights of the Mirror of Erised. I never want to see you girls back here. Men have gone mad staring at this mirror. It would do you more harm than good. Can you promise me that?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Good. Wingadium Leviosa." She brought out her wand, moving the giant blanked so that it covered the mirror. Laura said goodbye to her mother. "Now, then. Off to your Houses."

Carmilla smiled thankfully at her, holding out her hand for Laura as they got up. They stumbled upwards together, causing both girls to giggle, and they walked past the Headmistress hand in hand.

"Take care of each other, dears." She said gently, patting Carmilla on her shoulder.

They walked down the hallway to the Slytherin dorms, and Laura cautiously peered at Carmilla. "May I take a shower?"

"Of course, cutie." She smiles, cupping her cheek and gazing softly at her. Laura blushed. "Take your time."

Laura arrived a half hour later, looking so relaxed and refreshed. Carmilla's heart swelled with joy—she looked like a different girl than the one she had met earlier that morning. She wore a white tank top and sweat pants, her hair pulled up into a pony tail.

"Thank you." Laura says, once they've embraced.

"I should be the one thanking you." Carmilla hums, giving her nose a kiss.

"I'm sorry for worrying you."

"It's… it's fine, cupcake. Water under the bridge."

"I wish I had known someone did care for me. I would have stopped going a long time ago."

"Well. You can make it up to me now." She teased.

"I'm not going anywhere." Laura claims, giving Carmilla a kiss on her cheek.

Her face burned and her heart leaped.

"Good." She said, and Laura yawned. "C'mon. It's time for a nap."

Laura happily made her way towards the bed, bouncing on it, beckoning Carmilla to cuddle besides her. For the rest of the afternoon, Carmilla marveled at how precious her love was, and her heart was full.

It was nighttime when Laura stirred again, stretching her limbs and opening her eyes to see Carmilla reading a book.

"Hey." She smiled, leaning her head on Carmilla's chest and gazing softly at her.

"Hey." Carmilla replies, putting her book down.

"How long did I sleep?"

"Awhile. It's five pm."

"I still feel so tired." Laura moans, rolling opposite of Carmilla. She chuckles, leaning on her side and snuggling up with her.

"You were emotionally drained. Anyone would feel the same." She assures, lacing her fingers through Laura's hair.

"Carmilla." Laura started, gazing at her with soft brown eyes. "Why didn't you talk to me before now?"

The Slytherin sighs, "I was scared. I feared that you… already knew of my past and hated me. We never spoke. I figured that you'd heard all the rumors and had already casted your judgement."

"I never listen to those rumors. It's all talk until you hear the full truth. I didn't believe any of it. And even if you're the reason your family is gone, I don't care. I'm not leaving you. You're stuck with me."

"There are worst places to be." Carmilla says thickly, and Laura shoves her playfully.

"What did you see in the mirror, Carm?"

Carmilla closed her eyes. In her memory, she saw fire. Scorching, unforgiving fire that consumed her family. And a giant black panther, prowling in the middle of it, out for blood. She shivered.

Laura's grip around her tightened.

"My Animagus form. I turn into a panther."

"Cool beans." Laura says in awe, and Carmilla's eyes widen in surprise. She laughs, it was delirious and crazed. Then, she suddenly hunched over, hiding her face in her hands, as she cried for the second time that day.

"I never meant to hurt anybody. I-I didn't want—I wasn't in control of myself, Laura…" Laura positioned herself so that way she was holding Carmilla. "I'm a monster."

"Don't beat yourself up like this, baby. Hey. Sh. Take it easy." She soothes, rubbing Carmilla's stomach and peppering gentle kisses on her cheek. "Being an Animagus is nothing to be ashamed of. Headmistress McGonagall is one. She turns into an adorable kitty."

"My Mother," Carmilla weakly managed, after drying her tears, "Believed that all witches and wizards should have a pure bloodline. Only the most powerful, talented of us should be accepted into Hogwarts. She saw a promising future in me, and when she found out that I could turn, she… her trainings were brutal. I started turning at the age of four. Sometimes I would go for days without food, to test my stamina and obedience. She would have me sniff out the most dangerous of her enemies. But I… I was so scared. And so angry. She treated me like an animal, a tool, and I didn't know what to do. So, when I turned nine, something animalistic inside of me just… just snapped. I couldn't… I couldn't handle the torture and I killed her. I murdered my own Mother."

"Carm…" Laura hiccupped, "She wasn't your Mother. She was a monster. She deserved every beating you gave her. Stop beating yourself up over something you were in no control of."

"Why are you like this? Why are you painting me a hero?"

"Because, don't you see? You are a hero. You're so strong and brave. Students say all these vile, immature things about you and you just walked them off. I would never be able to do that."

"E-ever since that night… I haven't been able to sleep. I can't close my eyes, Laura. All I see are her eyes and… and…"

"Then don't force yourself to do anything," Laura says, rubbing noses with her, "All that matters is that you're safe now. You're here. I'm here."

"I'm so happy that you're here."

"Me too, Carm." She sighs, slowly kissing away her tears. They held each other for a long moment, neither wanting to move, when Carmilla's stomach growled. "Time to feed the kitten." She giggles, rubbing Carmilla's stomach. The Slytherin grumbled, burying her head into Laura's neck and tightening her grip.

"No." She mumbles, keeping her from leaving.

"C'mon, baby. I'm hungry too. And my friends… my friends probably miss me. We need to go back and check on them."

"Fine."

Laura smiles, giving Carmilla a kiss on her nose before wiggling out, and changes into her robe. Carmilla smiled lovingly back at her and did the same.

They were greeted by two blurs of red hair that collided into Laura in the Dining Hall.

"Frosh! You're alive! You're back! You're safe!" Ginger #2 exclaimed, tears glistening in their eyes as they hugged Laura.

"LaF… can't… breathe…"

"Honey, I know you love Laura, but please give her some space." Curly Sue smiled, and squeezed Laura's shoulder. "It's good to have you back, dear."

"It's good to be back."

"And you must be… Carmilla?" The curly haired witch asked with a nervous smile.

"Must I be?" She uttered with miserable indifference.

"Uh… Lau, since when did you hang out with mysterious and broody?" LaF asked, eyeing Carmilla curiously.

"Since this morning, and she will be sitting with us at dinner. Right, Carm?"

"I, uh. Oh. I shouldn't intrude on you and your friends."

Laura squeezed her hand and whispered gently into her ear, "Don't be scared. They're so kind and loving. Please. I want you to sit next to me."

"Hum. Okay." Carmilla pretends to sigh, and gives her cheek a grateful kiss.

The smile that lit on Laura's face would've solved world peace.

As it turns out, hanging out with the ginger twins wasn't so bad. She received a few glares from the jolly ginger giant, who tried to garner Laura's attention for most of the meal. But Carmilla by now was used to it, and brushed her off. There was a man child that lumbered around the group as well, hailing from Gryffindor, but he was close friends with Laura. Carmilla wasn't sure how she felt about him, with the way he used words like "hottie" or "babes" when it came to addressing women. Or his fraternity bro talk. But he seemed to be the kind of guy who wouldn't hurt a fly, and with the way he adoringly referred to Laura as "little nerd" Carmilla knew he was to be trusted.

This was a weird day. A happy day, but a weird day nonetheless. Laura sleeping soundly besides her, her breath coming out in short puffs on Carmilla's neck was a welcome change.

* * *

 

Three weeks have passed and Carmilla hasn't left Laura's side since that day. They were always attached by the hip, and people would often find them randomly hugging each other in the middle of the hallway once classes were finished.

They didn't listen to the rumors. They didn't bother watching the strange looks that were casted their way. They didn't care.

Carmilla was the happiest she's ever been. She was over the moon that Laura was in her life, that she could talk to her, feel her, love her.

Well, perhaps not that last one. Laura doesn't know of her feelings yet, even when they were slowly growing as each day passed.

They snuck into each other's dorms each night. Some days it would be Laura's, and on the weekends', they would just spend all day at Carmilla's. ("You have such a nice large bed Carmilla. Did you ever get lonely at night?" "Sometimes, creampuff. But it's not so lonely with you here now.")

Some nights, they joined Laura's friends in the dining hall and others they had a private dinner in Carmilla's dorm. Carmilla looked forward to those the most. There, they could be as obnoxious as they wanted to, as ridiculous as they wanted to, and wouldn't get reprimanded for goofing off.

On the last day of the third week, they were suddenly caught by an angry looking Theo Straka. "I knew it. You really have been sneaking this filthy mudblood into our house! That's against House Rules! You're not allowed to do this!"

Laura whimpers, and clutches Carmilla's arm. "Excuse me. What did you just call her?"

"Filthy mudblood." He sneered, and his comrades snickered beside him. "It's a match made in heaven. She's a freak and you're a monster."

Carmilla took out her wand swiftly, and made Theo magically grow a tail and a snout. "Since we're all giving each other names, I figured this one suits you perfectly.  _Pig_ ," she glares, and pushes him onto the ground, "You can call me a monster and a murderer all you like. But never call her a  _mudblood_  ever again. Have I made myself clear?"

He oinked in response, and his so-called friends laughed at him.

"Babe! I'm so proud of you!" Laura exclaimed happily, flinging herself into a hug. "You were so brave!"

"He had it coming." Carmilla said, giving her forehead a kiss.

"What is going on here? Straka, why are you a pig?" Headmistress McGonagall exclaimed, hurrying over with Professor Longbottom in tow.

"I think it quite suits his look, honestly." The Herbology teacher teases.

"He called Laura a mudblood, ma'am. I only did the first thing that came to mind."

The Headmistress looked on disapprovingly, "Regardless, you broke a rule. No wielding magic anywhere near the dorms. There are other students coming through and someone could get hurt. Ten points from Slytherin and Hufflepuff."

"But—but that's not fair! She was defending me!"

"It wasn't an act of defense. One more word, Ms. Hollis and you'll be granted detention," she sighs, and then turns to Theo, "But then again. We do not tolerate this kind of language at Hogwarts. That is quite an old school way of thinking. Every witch and wizard, no matter where their parents came from, is valid and still respected in these halls. You will be serving detention with Hagrid in the Dark Forest, Mr. Straka. Surely that will teach you a lesson."

He paled considerably, and oinked.

The Headmistress clasped her hands together, "Now, the lot of you, please go back to your Houses." She eyes Carmilla and Laura, "Your  _separate_  houses."

Laura sighed, fidgeting nervously with the hem of her robe as everyone shuffles away. "Good night, Carm."

"Night, cupcake. Sweet dreams."

Carmilla begrudgingly trudged back into her dorm, stripping herself from her robes and lying in her underwear in bed. It just felt so much bigger without Laura. She didn't like it. Shaking her head, she picked up a book and hoped that would ease her soul.

An hour passes.

Then three.

She hears a quiet voice calling out to her. "Psst. Carm!"

She smiled, hurrying over to her window and Laura was hovering beside it on her broom. She helped her love back into the room, placing the broom besides the bedside table.

"You came back."

"I'm only here because I missed your bed." Laura teases, snuggling into Carmilla's hug.

"Damn. I knew you were too good to be true."

"I've been told I'm a heart breaker."

"I'm sure you broke many girls' hearts before trying to get to mine," She chuckled, "Listen here cutie, I've got a few tricks up my sleeve that's going to charm the pants off ya. You've met your match."

"Is that a threat or a promise?"

"I can't reveal all my secrets. Otherwise I'd lose my air of mystery, won't I?"

"We wouldn't want that."

Laura fell asleep the moment her head hit the pillow, like always. Meanwhile, Carmilla smiled peacefully at her, and kissed her forehead.

* * *

 

It was a week later when Carmilla realized why she was falling in love with Laura. In the beginning, it was more of an ideal, a false reality where she lived parallel to Laura. Now, they were in sync, working together as a unit, tackling this thing they called life together.

Laura was beautiful. She had a smile that lit up the whole room, that people gravitated towards her. Every day was a new adventure with her. Her laugh warmed Carmilla's heart and helped her forget about all the evils in the world. Her loving, gentle caresses soothed Carmilla's racing heart, as she often struggled with managing her anxiety.

It was a snowy afternoon in the beginning of December when she suddenly became overwhelmed by her feelings. Laura shivered, as she was huddled over her Potions textbook and taking notes for her class.

"Cold?" Carmilla asked, wrapping her arms around Laura from behind her. "Yeah. I don't know any spells to fix the heater. I'm sorry, creampuff."

Laura giggled softly placed a gentle hand on her face, pulling Carmilla's towards her. "I'll be fine, baby."

Carmilla hesitated, pondering their dilemma for a long moment. Then, without warning, her body shifted into her Animagus form. Laura let out a shriek and flung her textbook in surprise, as the giant panther purred softly.

"Goodness, Carm! Warn a girl next time!" she exclaims, and took a cautious step forward. "So, this is really you, huh kitten?" She coos, allowing her hands to get lost in Carmilla's fur. "You're so soft and warm." She hums, giving the panther a kiss on her head. "You're so beautiful."

She purred again, nodding towards the bed. Laura laughed. "Alright, kitten. I'll take a break so we can cuddle."

They climbed into bed, the wood creaking under the panther's weight, and Laura snuggling besides her. "Thank you for trusting me. I know that must have taken a lot of courage." Carmilla stared back at her with those gorgeous, golden eyes. "You're not a monster. I'll remind you of this every day. As long as you'll keep me around for that long."

Carmilla let out a deep rumble, which sounded like laughter. She then gave Laura a big lick, causing the tiny creampuff to shriek. "Ew! Now I'm all slimy and gross!" She laughed, and Carmilla suddenly climbed on top of her, rubbing her cheek on Laura's neck. She could practically feel Laura's heart thumping in her chest. "Did you just… are you marking me?"

Carmilla stared at her with shameful eyes, looking away from her.

"No, kitten! Don't be ashamed. I'm just… it just took me by surprise, that's all. I wasn't expecting that." She admits, "Why would I want to change something that's apart of you?"

Carmilla smiles, and happily, cradled her as she drifted off to sleep.

The Slytherin was awkward around the Hufflepuff after that fiasco, even though it went down smoother than expected. Luckily Laura was as oblivious as ever so she didn't notice. She tried to distance herself, saying less whenever they hung out together, making silly excuses that she wanted to be alone.

Lafontaine was the one who noticed this change. Of course, they had. They were practically Laura's surrogate parent, keeping an eye on her twenty-four seven. They pulled her aside one afternoon after walking back from Hogsmede, giving her a stern glare.

"Alright, Elvira. What are your intentions with Laura?"

"My… intentions?"

"What's going on between you two? For the first few weeks, you two were acting ridiculously close and behaving like gal pals. I don't know what happened that day you found her, but it was never my place to ask. And now, I've noticed that you're starting to pull away from her. I fucking swear to you if you're about to break her heart you're going to have a date with my fist."

"Lafontaine, please!" Perry exclaimed, giving their partner's shoulders a gentle squeeze. "Take a deep breath. We're not going to solve this dilemma with confrontation." She slowly breathed in and urged them to do the same. They slowly breathed out together, and Perry rounded on Carmilla. "We both care deeply about Laura. And it's adorable to see how happy she is with you now. We're just… concerned because we don't know the status of your relationship."

"Oh. We're just… we're just friends."

" _Really_?" Lafontaine drawled, raising their eyebrow at her. "That's a load of bullocks."

"You're in love with her, aren't you?" Perry smiles.

"…I have been for a while."

"How long is a  _while_?"

"Five years, Einstein," she mumbled; Laf and Perry's eyes widened in shock. "But I can't… I'm so scared. I can't tell her. I don't want to ruin what we have."

"Oh, gods. Are you even listening to yourself? Carm, you should hear the things Laura says about you. She's always raving about how incredible and how loving you are. You treat her so well. I mean, she hasn't said it openly yet but it's clear to anyone with a brain that she loves you." Lafontaine utters, and Carmilla's cheeks flush.

_Laura Hollis loves me!_

"Aw. Look at her, Laf. She's blushing. She does have a heart."

"Shut up." Carmilla grumbled, shoving the curly haired woman aside. She giggled.

They walked back to the Hufflepuff House, and Helga allowed them all in. In the main living room she spotted the adorable girl, sprawled out on the couch and snoring softly.

"Go fetch your girlfriend, Karnstein." Lafontaine snickers, giving her shoulder a punch.

"Hey."

"Kitten!" she exclaimed, waking up with a happy shriek, "I missed you all day."

"So did I, love." She smiles, kissing her nose. "My place or yours?"

"Yours. I miss your big soft bed."

"Alrighty then." She said, lifting her up and carrying her bridal style. Lafontaine and Perry looked on with loving smiles on their faces.

* * *

 

Things seemed to have been going well. Carmilla took extra notice of how the hugs became longer, and the playful kisses suddenly became dangerously closer to her lips. She felt the sexual tension rise and fall between them as each day passes, and the playful banter also become flirtier than before. They were always together.

She would receive cautious, private looks from Perry while Lafontaine rolled their eyes and groaned at their behavior. She also started to see less of the ginger giant, which was a welcome change. She never liked Danny. The beanstalk always seemed to have an air of superiority about her, and seemed determined to hold onto the stupid Gryffindor and Slytherin rivalry that was decades old.

It wasn't until a snowy, cold night in December when Carmilla and Laura were going on their nightly walks back to the Slytherin dorm that she saw the beanstalk again.

"Hey, Hollis!" she exclaimed cheerfully, a bright smile on her face. Carmilla's heart clenched with nerves.

"Danny! Hey! It's been a while."

"Yeah, sorry about that. I've been practicing with the Quidditch team for the Hufflepuff versus Gryffindor finale this season."

"It's a real shame that you're doing all that practicing only to _lose_ ," Laura teases, staring at her nails. Carmilla chuckled, wrapping her arm around Laura's waist and pulling her close. "Lafontaine's going to kick your ass. They'll catch the snitch."

"Really? Well tell Lafontaine I'll gladly whip their ass twice as hard." She giggled, and so did Laura. "Well. Listen. Because I've been practicing so hard on Quidditch I've been falling behind on my studies, and I missed a few lessons in Potions. Do you mind if um… you can tutor me for a couple of hours?"

"It's a date!" Laura said brightly, and Carmilla internally screamed. Fuck.  _Why was this happening to her?_ "How does Friday night sound?"

"Sounds great! After dinner!" She leaned in to give Laura a hug, roughly pushing Carmilla aside. The real icing on the cake was when Danny pulled away, she gave Laura a fucking wink.

What in the frilly hell is going on?

She could feel her Animagus form growling within her, and it wasn't pleasant. Danny and Laura held their gaze for a second too long. She couldn't stop the growl that escaped her throat this time, as Danny cautiously peered at her.

"Okaaaay. So, um. I'll see ya later, Hollis." She murmured, and hurried off.

Laura tilted her head curiously at her, "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Me? Gee, thanks for completely throwing me under the bus back there!"

"I wasn't—Carmilla, Danny just needed help with studying."

Carmilla snorts. "Studying. Right. It's not like she wants to get into your pants or anything."

Laura's eyes sprinkled with tears, "Carmilla! How dare you! Danny and I are just friends!"

"Open your eyes, creampuff. She's had the hots for you all year. There's nothing holding you back from being with her."

"Oh, so now you're acting like you don't care. Or have you forgotten everything that we've been through?!"

"What are you insinuating? That we're girlfriends? Tough shit, Laura. That train left the station and you missed it a long time ago. And you know what, the more I think about it, we wouldn't have worked out. Your friends hate me, Laura. Everyone hates me. I'm not your hero. I have a past, Laura. A past that suffocates me of all the good things that are in this world. Do you think I'm going to change all that for you just because I love you?"

Laura was crying. Carmilla glared at her, "I'm tired, of being strung around by your prissy little mind games. You were just toying with me, weren't you? Dragging me along, pretending that everything was all nice and wonderful? I see right through you. I'm  _done._ "

"Go away, then! Run just like the coward you are!"

"I'M NOT A COWARD!" Carmilla screamed, angrily shoving Laura aside, and her heart ached at the tears streaming down her beloved's face.

That night, when Carmilla tried to sleep, nightmares tormented her.

* * *

 

Five days. Five. Whole. Fucking. Days. Laura didn't speak to her. Didn't even look at her. Carmilla was living in Hell. Lafontaine was fuming. They had kept their promise, punching Carmilla square in the nose before collapsing on her, crying because of the state their best friend was in. Perry had to drag them away, apologizing profusely to Carmilla.

She felt numb. After spending every day with Laura, she couldn't adjust well to the change. Her heart ached. She cried a lot. She skipped out on eating, since anything she tried to consume she would vomit back up.

Gods, she was a fucking idiot. Why did she always mess things up?

"Miss Karnstein. A word." Headmistress McGonagall called out, as the rest of the students shuffled out of class.

"What." She said, her voice clipped.

"Now don't take that tone with me, young lady. I've noticed that you've been slacking off in classes. You were doing so well. I thought things were going well for you and Miss Hollis."

The name felt like a stab in the throat. "I didn't ask you for any love advice, Professor."

"It's my right to support and assist you as your legal guardian," She snaps, "And I don't like this change in you. I've had several complaints from students that you've been giving them problems; hexing Theo Strakas again, for example. Throwing JP Armitage's books onto the floor. I'm sensing a pattern here, and I don't like it. Please, love. Talk to me."

Carmilla's lip quivered, "I fucked up. I fucked up and she hates me now," she put her head in her hands, "She was the one good thing. The one good thing and of course the universe just fucking… just fucking takes her away."

"Carmilla…" The Headmistress sighed, as she went over to hug her, "Don't think things like that. Please. Laura doesn't hate you. She loves you."

"Everyone keeps telling me that and it's kind of hard to believe them now." Carmilla hiccupped, wiping her eyes.

"Darling, I see it in her eyes. It's the kind of love I haven't seen in a while. It's precious and greater than what magic can give. Whatever happened don't let it separate you for good."

"I'll think of something." She mumbles.

"Until then, take care of yourself. Remember to sleep and eat. And take a shower. You smell like you haven't in days."

"Yes, ma'am."

It was Friday. Laura would be having her study session with Danny tonight. The thought of Laura spending another second with that beanstalk made her blood boil. But at the same time, she realized she was out of line.

She shouldn't have said those things to her.

She had to make it up to her somehow.

She was going to win Laura back.

She needed to apologize.

It was late in the evening now; not many students were roaming about, which eased Carmilla's anxiety. Carmilla let out a deep breath, listening closely to Danny and Laura in the library.

"You okay, Hollis?" She asked softly, "You've been sighing a lot."

Laura sniffs, "I'm… fine. Just haven't been sleeping well, I suppose."

"Yeah. I can tell by the dark circles under your eyes," She then scoffs, "What's really going on?"

"I miss her, Danny,"

"Who?"

"I miss Carmilla," Laura hiccups, "And I fucked everything up by being here. Because she's never going to come back to me."

"Shit, Laura. What happened?"

"You happened!" She whimpered, "Carm felt so scared and threatened because of you. Because ever since she came into our lives, you've been nothing but a raging bitch!"

"Whoa. Okay. That's a little out of left field, Laura."

"No, it's not! Carmilla's been nothing but nice to all of us. You're the one who's been putting her in a bad light, who's been glaring at her, who's been making stupid comments under her breath. For once, can you stop acting like you're better than everyone else?!"

"But she's… Laura… do you know what happened to her? What she did?"

"Of course, I do! She trusted me with that information and told me the full story! You can't even begin to imagine the hell that she must have gone through! You have no fucking right to judge her!" She then throws up her hands in defeat, "But none of that matters now. Because she's gone."

Carmilla's heart broke. She peered around the corner, frowning as she saw Laura huddled over, crying her eyes out. She willed her Animagus form to her, getting down on all fours. She slowly stalked towards them.

"Fuck. Laura, get behind me." Danny said wildly, reaching out for Laura. Carmilla growled.

It was a scary, guttural sound.

_Hands. Off. My. Mate._

She hopped on the table, her two giant paws pushing aside all the books they were using to study. Carmilla glared with every fiber of her being at Danny, who wilted in place.

"Carmilla!" Laura exclaimed, getting in front of Danny.

"Laura, I hate to break it to you, but that beast isn't the vampire queen."

"Shut up! You have no right to say anything!" Laura exclaims, and takes a step towards the panther. "Kitten…" She says gently, placing a hand on Carmilla's snout. "You came back. I'm so proud of you… I missed you so much."

"I'm so sorry." She hiccupped.

Noticing the tears that streamed down Laura's face, Carmilla leaned into her touch, nudging her hand. "Don't you ever leave me again, stupid cat." She whimpers, pushing her off the table. She came around from the other side so she could fully embrace Carmilla.

Danny sighs quietly, and Carmilla watches her leave with a hard glare.

"I don't want to be light and casual with you," Laura whimpered, gripping onto Carmilla's fur. "I don't wanna pretend that what I feel about you is some stupid, frothy thing that doesn't matter because you are the axis that my world turns on. And yeah. We can talk ourselves out of it because this is scary. And hard. And some days it feels like the world's about to end. But when it does I want something good for us to hold onto. You are… flawed. And struggling. And uncertain. But it's so… beautiful. The way that you try."

Carmilla's heart soared as she turned back into a human, her hands cupping Laura's face, "To hell with light and casual." She whimpered, pulling Laura in for a bruising kiss. Laura practically melted, gripping onto Carmilla's hair and she could feel her toes curling in pleasure.

Carmilla felt like crying.

"I love you. Why can't that be something good?"

"Say that again."

"I love you, Carmilla," Laura laughed, giving Carmilla a languid kiss.

"Laura!"

"I'm so in love with you." She decries, peppering Carmilla's face with kisses.

"I've loved you for so long…" she huffs, holding onto Laura's arms. "I just never thought you loved me back."

"I can't ever remember a time where I didn't love you," Laura laughs tearfully, "I'm so sorry for making you wait so long."

"It's all in the past now, creampuff." Carmilla sighs, leaning her forehead against Laura's.

"Good. Because I plan on loving you for a while."

"I'll hold you to that." They both giggled, hearts overflowing with love and adoration.

They held each other for a long moment, Laura with her head resting on Carmilla's chest and Carmilla's head buried within Laura's neck.

"Ah-hem." They both looked up to see the Headmistress with a stern expression on her face. "While I'm glad you two idiots solved your lover's quarrel, the library is closed. Please go back to your House."

"Yes, ma'am." They both droned, and then giggled at her expense.

That night, both Carmilla and Laura had a peaceful sleep.

* * *

 

"It looks like Gryffindor and Hufflepuff are neck and neck! They're tied with 120 points!" JP Armitage, everyone's favorite Ravenclaw, shouted. "Ooh! Look at Lawrence go! She's really been carrying the team so far! But it's anyone's game!"

"Hufflepuff! Hufflepuff! C'mon Lafontaine, you've got this!" Laura screamed, as her friend breezed past her on their broom. Carmilla groaned and rolled her eyes. She really disliked going to Quidditch games. They were too loud, and she didn't particularly like being crammed in a small place with everyone she hated.

She put her book down as she shamelessly stared at Laura's ass.

Well. Not  _everyone_.

They came very close to missing the whole game, making out on Laura's bed until Perry came in and ushered them down to breakfast. She would have preferred they stuck with their original plan and missed the whole shebang.

Feeling bold, Carmilla wrapped her arms around Laura's waist and began to nibble on her ear.

"Caaaaaarm, come on. Can't you at least pretend to enjoy the game?"

"I am enjoying the game. You're quite fun to tease. I'm having a grand time." She husks, placing several kisses on Laura's cheeks. "All I'm asking for is that we continue this somewhere it's a little more private."

"We will, kitten. When this is finished. Learn to be patient, okay?" Carmilla puffed an anxious breath into her neck and she giggled. "I know this isn't your ideal. But I just wanted to say that you're a trooper and I'm proud of you. I love you."

"I'll never get tired of you saying that to me," Carmilla hums, snuggling her head on Laura's shoulder. "I love you, too."

" _Lafontaine has spotted the snitch_!" JP exclaims, and the crowd roars. "They're heading towards it!"

"Go, go, Hufflepuff! There goes the friendly badger, finding all the treasure!" Laura sang. It was so adorable.

"Lawrence is hot on their trail! It's a close call!"

Laura was squirming in place, using Carmilla's hands to wave them around in her own excitement.

"Lafontaine is—hang on—what the frilly hell are they doing?"

Carmilla watched in awe as the mad scientist skillfully stood up from their broom, reaching out to get better leverage in catching the snitch. Danny didn't seem to be in control of her broom as she rammed into them by accident, and they fell to the ground, the golden snitch missing.

"Lafontaine!" Perry exclaimed, leaving her post as keeper to assist her partner. "Someone, help them!"

"Oh no, it looks like they're going to vomit." Laura sniffs, hiding her face on Carmilla's arm.

Carmilla watched as the young teen hunched over, clutching their stomach and facing the ground. It surely wasn't a pretty sight.

Then, within a second, a golden snitch hopped out of Lafontaine's mouth, and they caught it quickly in their hands.

They proudly held it up.

"LAFONTAINE HAS CAUGHT THE GOLDEN SNITCH! Hufflepuff wins!" JP cheers, and so does the crowd.

"We've won! Carm, we did it, we did it, we did it!" Laura cheers, and Carmilla smiles as the scoreboard turns from 120 to 500. She then jumps into Carmilla's embrace, causing the young witch to stumble backwards as she passionately kissed her.

Carmilla sighs happily, her heart full, as she kissed her girlfriend back.

"So, since my house won, what do you say we use this opportunity to celebrate?" Laura husks, biting down on Carmilla's lips.

"I think I'd like that very much, creampuff." She replied, hands gripping Laura's ass.

"My place or yours?"

" _Mine_ ," Carmilla growled, surprised at how animalistic she sounded. She wanted to claim Laura as hers. Heat pooled in her stomach at the thought of Laura's bare chest.

It felt like a long, grueling wait to get back to the Slytherin dorm, but they were grateful everyone was still out celebrating.

Clothes were flown on the floor. Hands were getting lost in hair. And hearts beating rapidly against their ribcages. They were face to face. Chest to chest. Carmilla sighed in sweet relief.

"C-Carmilla… baby… wait," Laura breathed, and Carmilla stopped kissing her neck to peer at her girlfriend. "This is my, um… I-I'm a virgin. This will be my first time." She uttered shyly, nervously rubbing her arm.

Carmilla laughed, caressing her face gently, "Do you think I have any idea what I'm doing? It's mine, too. You're my first."

"I am glad." She sighs happily, pulling Carmilla in for another languid kiss. "I love you."

"Gods. I love you too, creampuff."

 

 

Carmilla held Laura as she came, screaming her name to the heavens above. She had never looked so beautiful before. Carmilla came quickly after, the sheets between them becoming damp.

They lay on top of each other, both panting heavily, utterly spent.

"Hey, Carm."

"Hmm." Carmilla murmured, sucking on her neck. "What is it, creampuff?"

"You are my new dream."

Carmilla paused, and breathing in deeply as she felt tears glistening in her eyes, she said, "And you are mine."

Laura giggled, as she kisses Carmilla one more time, before resting her head back against the pillows. She tilts her head to the window, admiring the stars, before letting out an excited shriek. "Kitten, look! It's snowing!"

Carmilla smiled softly at her love. She rests her head on Laura's breasts and listened to her girlfriend talk excitedly about the tomorrows they will soon have.

What a beautiful thought to hold on to.

There will be a tomorrow.

**THE END**

**Author's Note:**

> We finally have a movie. I'm so proud of the little web series that could.


End file.
